The Exquisite Corpse

Being a horror story written cooperatively by attendees of La Fête Sanguinaire, March 7th 2009.

On a dark and stormy night there was screaming that filled the air, and looming in the dark night was a forlorned stranger. He brought forth a bloodied woman, writhing in ecstasy as the tentacles ravaged her voloptuous body was ripped asunder by swarms of something. Flying towards the midnight meeting, little hearts no longer beating. The pain was excruciating as doing taxes on April 15th. "Why why why me" the whining was incessant ass the ax was buried into the ground before them. They picked up the ax and began to walk towards his mother, for kicking him out of the house in the middle of April. As you know, April is my usual high menstrual cycle time, so I locked myself in the closet, stripped off all my clothing and screamed maniacally.

Suddenly from the shadows there appeared the form of a large wolf then bared his/her teeth. Nothing could be more terrifying as this scene of the wolf leaping and snarling toward our hero/heroine. Would he/she survive this attack? Tara took a step back away slowly, calculating and anticipating her attackers every move, every time they stepped toward her she matched and mirrored theier every move. Then suddenly stars exploded from the walls with a force unheard of before in those parts! The mirroring ones screamed in terror and fled, but ran into a wall of fire.

Suddenly the fire parted and a man appeared. He was wearing a long black cape and heavy boots. He smiled, sinisterly and said, "Would you like some too? It's delicious!"

I replied, slowly licking my pointy canine, "Speaking of delicious, you look quite delicious yourself this evening. I'd love to take a bite of you..." the last I whispered against fragrant neck skin. The blood dripped on my lips, sweet virgin blood always tasted best, so I started to do her in the butt before she turned.

"Wait you bastard!! You better not be wearing a garlic condom. I need to make sure you don't shrivel up soon."

The werewolf burst into the room and tried to throw holy water on me, I came in surprise, for I've never lasted longer than three minutes. I squealed like a pig in heat. The warming ooze felt good against my sensitive skin. The smutty feeling overwhelmed me, I felt dirty but relieved. But then I knew something went horribly awry... I looked up at the ceiling and there were cameras everywhere. Now, everyone will know.

"Holy shit, this better not go to youtube you fuckers. There will be hell to pay" I cried. Tears welling up in sheer frustration at the indignity. But to his dismay it did end up on youtube and it also became the number one search on google, embarrassing him forever. This man constantly replays his actions in his head a bit like a broken record, like glass and acid the memories have been etched into his mind. Planning his next move is the only way he will be fully able to regain consciousness and return back to earth.

Unfortunately his next move was utterly beyond comprehension. He could only pick up his broom, shoulder his rifle, and get back in the truck.

Fear of the future, not understaning where he'd been, a slow simmering anger began to brew. The thought of returning to what seemed like less of a home now was odd. Can life return to what it once was? And he thought holy crap, I'm so screwed.

As he ran screaming from the altar, clutching his hat tightly in his hand. Panting heavily, he darted from the building, screaming uncontrollably as he went. Down the stairs he ran horrored by the masses of zombies approaching from behind.

The End.